Dobleve

Not so much.

Of all the things I never imagined I’d be doing – ever – high on the list is hosting a Super Bowl party. However, since we moved to Spain we have found ourselves explaining and celebrating all things American, for our Spanish friends. When they expressed interest, even bald excitement at watching the Super Bowl, it was *almost* contagious, definitely interesting. And, to be fair, there’s almost nothing we love more than throwing a party. So, as our good friend responded when we invited her to the Super Bowl party: “GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”.

Since I’ve only ever been to one Super Bowl party in my life, I’m not entirely certain how to host a “real American” Super Bowl party. From my recollection it’s all about food (and maybe beer?). (and I suppose the game…) As in all things “real American” I turned to the internet for guidance. In this way I came up with what I think is a solid “real American” Super Bowl party menu. Since then we have hit several stores to find things like refried beans, cheddar cheese, hot sauce for buffalo wings (sooo out of my league as a former vegetarian that we’re cooking them on the roof!), stuff for barbecue sauce and ranch and blue cheese dressings, tortilla chips, etc. Just about everything on the menu is totally foreign to our friends here and are they curious!! (Although in a nod to the less adventurous we’ll of course serve jamón, patatas fritas, almonds and manchego.)

This won’t be any ordinary Super Bowl party. Among other things, we have a friend (from Holland) who was amazed to learn the American National Anthem is not asking José whether he can see; the game starts here at Midnight and will have Spanish announcers; and, previous attempts at explaining the game have gone something like this:

Friend: “well, first, what’s the ball shaped like?”

Me: “Hmm – Like, not round like a futbol but a little more oblong (as if I can say oblong in Spanish) coming to points at the end.” (Said with lots of helpful air-drawing).

Friend: Silence.

Me: More air drawing while explaining that it’s brown with white stripes and made from the skin of a pig.

Friend: More silence and the look we so often get when trying to explain many things American…

Finally, while we’re prepared to explain the rules of the game, and that yes, Americans eat melted cheese on tortilla chips, I don’t know what we’ll say if anyone asks why so many Americans went nuts over Janet Jackson’s half-time “fiasco” – why it’s perfectly okay and even celebrated to gather the family around for ritualized commercialized violence, but God save us all if anyone has to see a woman’s nipple on NATIONAL TELEVISION.